Angel F. Lee
Chaplain, Atrium Health, Wake Forest Baptist Hospital, Winston-Salem, NC
My ultimate desire for my life is peace. I used to understand peace as the absence of conflict and people pleasing. As a Black woman in America, I have learned that there is no peace without conflict. I continue to see people who look like me being killed and treated unjustly. I constantly face microaggressions and oppression in the spaces that I occupy. Choosing not to address injustice fills my being with hopelessness, as it feels that there is no end to injustice. My former understanding of peace is what the dominant culture wants me to believe so that the status quo will remain. Yet, it was leading me to a slow death, and I felt it in my spirit.
What has saved my life is an understanding of holy peace. Jesus says to his disciples, “Do not think that I have come to bring peace to earth; I have not come to bring peace but a sword” (Matthew 10:34). Understanding Jesus as a radical prophet who taught and exhibited God’s love for all creation, contrary to the dominant culture, helped me to understand holy peace.
I get to walk in the footsteps of Jesus in my work as a chaplain educator. I teach clergy to connect with divine wisdom and to care with love and compassion. I advocate for those who are experiencing injustice within the hospital and the community. I love my students and patients with the love of God. True peace comes by acknowledging and combating “the spiritual forces of evil in heavenly places” (Ephesians 6:12) with the love and power of God.
My classroom is a brave space for clergy to identify such forces and process how to address them with divine love. What brings me the most joy is witnessing the transformation in my students’ pastoral care, preaching and leadership due to my radical love and teachings. To know that God uses me to advance peace IS saving my life right now.
Writing also saves my life; for I hear the voice of God when I write. I wrote the poem below several years ago. This piece was healing then and continues to heal me when my spirit is affected by the evil and hate in this world. May the peace of God that surpasses all understanding rest in your heart.
Pray, Practice, Ponder
Read the poem below slowly, meditatively, as a form of prayer.
Woman of Confidence
I look in the mirror and see a woman of worth.
She is so blessed that her cup constantly overflows with riches.
So, she gives her time, wisdom, care and materials so that others can know their worth.
I look in the mirror and see a woman of love.
She is so blessed that she is surrounded by caring communities.
So, she smiles and basks in the glory of her natural and spiritual family.
I look in the mirror and see a woman of strength.
She is so blessed that God sends angels to protect her on all sides.
So, she walks confidently everywhere she goes, knowing that she is God’s anointed.
I look in the mirror and see me.
Pray. . .Give. . .Go.